I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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