So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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