she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
