can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Randomize
