Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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