My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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