I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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