UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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