Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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