White coat. Heels.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
