Sacagawea was the original milf.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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