Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
