remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
