Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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