yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
