We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
