That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
