I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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