me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
