Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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