It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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