Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Randomize
