Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
did you just send me my own nude
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
