I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
