i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
