after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
