She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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