Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I just found puke in my bra..
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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