I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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