I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
