You're my little dorito
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
