There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
