I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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