I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
