ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
