I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
