me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
