At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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