I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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