To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
