I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
