What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize