he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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