After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
