omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
my god I love twenty year old dicks
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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