he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Randomize
