Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
