I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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