your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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