Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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