I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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