I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
